To whom it may concern,
I was filled with purpose, to stop the end of the world, and in union with God above, wakeup the sleeping witnesses. I was shaken and wrestled, into a lonely time in sadness for many years, and when the miracles began in the Advent season, I was given a mission to love another. For many years leading up to this Advent season, I was waiting and wondering, what would happen to the world, as the end came, but when Advent began, I was hopeful that I could still be the saviour. I was led into an uprising, and I stood apart from the people, to call unto them, for the sake of salvation, but it was revelation that drew me to her, that she became the focus of my ministry. I wasn’t sure exactly how, but I knew miracles would breakthrough, with love being the motive, and a sacred compromise, between the forces of creation.
Everything was spiralling around my head, and the dizziness of the chase, made me stumble and fall. While people in their idleness walked past me, there were few willing to help me back onto my feet. But God was there for me, and He picked me up from the ditch, and snatched me off of the road to Damascus and gave me new vision, into love and the sacred bond between us. God was blessing me, when nobody else wanted my Messiahship, and the Lord aided me through the hard times. Now I see that our ending world, will not awaken before tribulation, and the only other human that could have understood my heartcry, was a million miles away and chose to stay there. Only the woman could have come into agreement, and stood with me against the world ending, but I pushed her away, and she never forgave me. I don’t know where else to turn, in order to find a reliable witness willing to help me. I made my mind up, that there was hope, but no one on Earth, met me on hollowed ground.
Now is the time for action, but the church folk assume all is well, and my own family couldn’t care less. The common excuse I get is, that nothing can be done to save Earth, because the task is so great, and each person feels helpless when facing something so monumental. They would rather donate to the poor a little money, and time, or help animals and the environment, or choose a profession that makes a little difference, instead of uniting under one revolutionary banner, and giving life the greatest significance. The need was great, and the time was short, but the outpouring of God’s Holy Spirit, would have been so immense, that the entire planet would have stopped on a dime, and shifted gears in a change of direction. The Good Lord would have so radically blessed us, that we would one day be teaching future generations of His Goodness. However, there was no way forward without Lesley, and I was alone calling out my lamentations of mayday. Everyone else I talked to, was wrapped up either in bible publications, or some contemporary form of entertainment, or worldview, and my claims of a Messiah coming to Earth in body, was ignored and overlooked. I was Christos, and anointed by God to preach and teach, but I was speaking to deaf ears, and blind eyes could not see.
It was easy for me to get certified under the law, and hospitalized because of my past. I was in the hospital a number of times in 2019, and that was for pushing my boundaries and disturbing the peace. I called FBI field offices, and 911, and testified at churches, and on open mic nights, from poetry slams, to testimony night at Metro, and to fellow patients at the hospital, and to my family, but the people were uninterested. I handed out tracts and spread my message on the internet, but still none of the people came in a timely fashion. The only person who cared as deeply about the Earth was Lesley, but she chose a different course, other than devoting to our survival. I guess she wanted to leave here, and embrace a whole different world, than to help the one we had in a big way. The planet was spiralling into oblivion, and only a great disruption to the status quo, would have been enough to get everyone looking, but the world carried on and continued in sin, and the true trumpet of God was not heard by the nations, so the planet dies.
Nobody knows the day nor the hour, but the end will come, and will sweep us away into the grave. It’s a terrible fate for our poor planet Earth, and we have little time to overt it. Still nobody knows me, or why I was sent to call out revelation. No church has accepted my teaching, no agnostic had the mindfulness of the truth, and they are so blinded towards the Apocalypse, they often think as though it’s not their problem, but it’s all of our burdensome tribulation. The clock winds down, and the end will shock the desperation for life into the whole world, but by then it’s too late to stop the war machine from grinding onward. In one final push to safety, many will attempt to survive, but the fallout, and famine, will be enough to kill them by the billions. This happened instead of love answering the call to save the day.
I think about what my life has meant to those around me, and who has benefited from my worship, but without a sign or miracle, nobody took to the urgency of my ministry, or chose to follow the Shepard. My life was holy, to provide for those who required help, and wake up Eve from her own status quo, but most people in my country felt full with answers, and Eve too became filled with her own vision. I saw miracles could spring up between me and her, and only a miracle would have been big enough news, to get everyone looking in our direction, but I am here today, still a lone messenger with no miracle, and the world is ending, while I continue to flounder and wish for her waters. Drought came to the world, and a Third World War erupted from the belligerents, and the worst part was that it could have been prevented, but wasn’t. It was allowed to happen, and was shamefully not avoided, and billions of people died. It was up to her and me, but we both made poor choices along our separate journeys, that would keep us miles apart. Unity in love was our calling, but the chasm stayed uncrossed, and she never chose to meet me. It is the greatest disappointment, and we will give an account for what happened.
I am humbly apologetic, for my past blunders, and foolish mistakes. I had an anointing to preach and teach, but was unwell for too many years, and restricted in my opportunity. The greatest and best opportunity of my life, was blessing Lesley, and choosing to pursue her love, and prove my own. I feel like my past was too much for her, and the terrible strife I put her through, swayed her decision to choose the Omega. The end days were full of fearful events around the world, and chaos in the streets, but the quest of love was an anchor and sanctuary for me. I believed my destination was with her, but I wasted my time rapping the Advent to her, and feel embarrassed about my performance. I’m sorry I let her down, and I wish I could change the past, and still have hope she is coming to save me, but looking at the calendar, I feel like there isn’t a way, and she chose the death of me. If only I had awoken earlier, and if only I had the help I needed for my mental illness in my youth, I wouldn’t have made shipwreck this entire movement, and could have offered the help this planet’s people deserved. I am responsible for my choices, and believe I have let God down, by not winning the heart of the woman I was meant to inspire. What a narrow doorway it was, and yet I stand at the door and knock, hoping she will answer, and come forward with me, to the news stations and police, to let them know that we have salvation in our midst.
The air raid sirens have been going off, and I feel like my part of the world wont last long. I feel fearful of a coming disaster, and don’t want to watch my family die. I want life, and I want to survive the End Days, but believe she has chosen to let me go into despair and anguish, without her help. I feel she has made up her mind, and doesn’t want to help, and has chosen to hunker down, and wait for the explosions. The people will starve, and the cities will burn, and I feel like a total failure, by not saving the world with her. I am relinquished of my choice, and only she herself can choose to help, though she won’t even reply, or tell me she cares. I am truly Jacob Marley rattling chains, and warning people of the looming disaster, and I must continue raising a ruckus, and keep my voice crying out, that I want to be saved, and I want life.
This Is My Testament Joy and Sorrow statements. Please hope for tomorrow but don't be evoking the wrong ideas about the authorship or the author from now on and forevermore.